Welcome to CoolGames Inc Jr — packed with all the game design you know and love, but in a convenient, bite-sized 20 minute format! In CGI Jr's debut episode, we explore KanColle for babies, Kingdom Hearts for babies, VeggieTales for babies, and much, much more.
Introduction[]
Due to Griffin's upcoming absence for the whole month of September, he and Nick decide to record four short minisodes of CoolGames Inc back-to-back, each with a specific restriction. After Nick suggests calling these minisodes as 'CoolGames Inc Junior', Griffin suggests making all the games in this first minisode for babies.
This Episode's Game[]
- An image submission of a large sign reading "ENTERTAINMENT SIMULATORS" with five different pictures of Sora (submitted by @SweatdropEmoji)
"ENTERTAINMENT SIMULATORS"
Kingdom Hearts for Babies (full title: Kingdom Hearts: 0.5 Dream Draw By Sleep Divided By 2 of Memories) is a watered-down Kingdom Hearts spin-off aimed at three-year-olds. Wiggling the analogue sticks produces sounds and makes Goofy pop up. All of the buttons do something explosive, colorful, educational, and geometric when pressed. Nick and Griffin then realise that "baby nonsense, sounds and lights and colors" also describes the Kingdom Hearts franchise in general.
Other Game Ideas Discussed[]
Imagine: Baby to Baby[]
An image submission of a ten foot-wide sign which reads "IMAGINE BABY TO BABY" in Impact font. A combat game in which WWII military vessels are represented by babies with missiles strapped to their backs (à la KanColle). When a baby gets blown up, a mommy calls timeout and takes them away. Rejected as Griffin doesn't want to militarize babies. (submitted by @dichotoman)
What If Connect 4 Was a Cursed Board Game Like Jumanji[]
A movie adaptation of Connect 4 starring most of the same cast from Jumanji, with Rihanna taking Robin Williams' role. The cursed element is in the form of a giant heavy puck which falls from the sky and crushes David Alan Grier's car. (submitted by @Bunnynaut)
Johnny Stringbean, If You Kill a Chicken For Us, We Will Forgive You[]
A vintage comic of two onion ladies talking, one of whom is saying the above phrase. A dark, pro-animal rights version of VeggieTales in which produce encourage the player to commit sins. Rejected by Griffin due to the recent Sausage Party cornering the market.
Twitch applies for a job- Person is applying for jobs, Twitch livestream determines what they say on resume and interviews[]
The resume part is dropped from this suggestion, as the entrant would not get the interview unless they were applying to be an idiot. The entrant wears a hidden earpiece and repeats everything Twitch says, most of which is "Kappa". Rejected as Griffin doesn't want babies applying for jobs. (submitted by @Oliveman)
Trivia[]
- Griffin's absence for the entirety of September 2016 was a consequence of filming in Huntington, West Virginia for the My Brother, My Brother and Me television show.